I think today is a good day to talk about rude people, since there are so many of them and they always seem to give you feedback when you are most vulnerable. I HATE RUDE PEOPLE! Almost as much as I hate sin. I have tried everything from saying thank you and walking away irritated, to ignoring the person, to putting them in their place. This week I got snappy with a girl, who overheard my conversation with a friend regarding trying to conceive. This girl says to me, " girl you just need to freakin relax, and stop freaking out". PISSED off was an understatement, I immediately felt my face turn hot and I decided that was it. Im not going to be the nice girl who always walks away, but is always the one hurting. Not today! I looked that girl in the face and said, relaxing wont help my uterus carry a baby or make my endometriosis go away. She shut her mouth so fast. People always want to give you advice wether its on how your wedding should be, or who you should marry, date, how you should dress, or act, how to get pregnant, and even how to raise your child. So annoying, although some advice I actually take into consideration, depending on the source.
When a woman is trying to get pregnant its really emotionally draining when month after month we end up empty womb. I feel myself comparing me to other people, why cant I get pregnant, but rude people can? or why can a serial killer get pregnant, or child molesters? I drive myself nuts wondering how its possibly fair that I cannot get pregnant. I really try my hardest at life. I work to full capacity and love what I do, all while loving the kids and families I care for.
OK enough with my bitter ranting. We are trying again this month to get pregnant. Im so tired of trying, I hate the routine of having to thing about what cycle day I am. I hate having to remember to take certain medications, or make it to appointments. My work schedule is insane and its stressful having to move days just to make appointments. We have an ultrasound this friday to see how many eggs we have and how big they are. Hopefully the week after that we will do another iui, hopefully this time it works, although I must admit I don't think it will. I have a feeling we are going to have to save a small fortune just to get pregnant. Im going to talk to dr. potter regarding ivf and the NYC program. I am going to see if he will monitor me while on the study. We will see...
Anyway, Im going to take Harvey to centinella today, he LOVES it there. Its pretty cold and rainy but it will be fun to buy him some treats. Later today I am going to paint my friends nails, Daddy bought me shellac nail polish and the special uv light for christmas so that I could do my nails and my friends. Im really excited to use them. I did your grammies Saturday night . We painted them a really pretty red with sparkles on top. She loves sparkles. We celebrated christmas that day with Grammie and Papa, it was nice. We got them a really great photo-canvas from our wedding with all the kids in it. It was really nice. It was fun to watch them look at it and smile. We loved that it will be a timeless gift and one that doesn't take up much room at all. Grammie and Papa spoiled mommy and daddy. They always do.
When a woman is trying to get pregnant its really emotionally draining when month after month we end up empty womb. I feel myself comparing me to other people, why cant I get pregnant, but rude people can? or why can a serial killer get pregnant, or child molesters? I drive myself nuts wondering how its possibly fair that I cannot get pregnant. I really try my hardest at life. I work to full capacity and love what I do, all while loving the kids and families I care for.
OK enough with my bitter ranting. We are trying again this month to get pregnant. Im so tired of trying, I hate the routine of having to thing about what cycle day I am. I hate having to remember to take certain medications, or make it to appointments. My work schedule is insane and its stressful having to move days just to make appointments. We have an ultrasound this friday to see how many eggs we have and how big they are. Hopefully the week after that we will do another iui, hopefully this time it works, although I must admit I don't think it will. I have a feeling we are going to have to save a small fortune just to get pregnant. Im going to talk to dr. potter regarding ivf and the NYC program. I am going to see if he will monitor me while on the study. We will see...
Anyway, Im going to take Harvey to centinella today, he LOVES it there. Its pretty cold and rainy but it will be fun to buy him some treats. Later today I am going to paint my friends nails, Daddy bought me shellac nail polish and the special uv light for christmas so that I could do my nails and my friends. Im really excited to use them. I did your grammies Saturday night . We painted them a really pretty red with sparkles on top. She loves sparkles. We celebrated christmas that day with Grammie and Papa, it was nice. We got them a really great photo-canvas from our wedding with all the kids in it. It was really nice. It was fun to watch them look at it and smile. We loved that it will be a timeless gift and one that doesn't take up much room at all. Grammie and Papa spoiled mommy and daddy. They always do.
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